No. I’m not talking about the four lettered word which is the theme of this month in most of our lives. That, even though people say it is forever, it is hardly so. Love comes, it goes, and very rarely sticks around forever when we are expecting it to.
The thing that never dies… that is expectation.
Let me take my life for an example. I was born, and my relatives expected me to be named something other than Gagan . (Mummy let me in on this.) Some of the names they suggested are positively ghastly to hear. First expectation down the drain… I grew up into a handsome little boy(now,didn't I ?). They expected me to get into the best school; so much so, they left me with some weird looking strangers who asked me questions I had no idea what to say to. I suppose they were mathematics, but how they foretold that I would have affection for that subject, God only knows! That expectation, thankfully, was met and I started enjoying my school life. It was fine for a while, but once I got into middle school, I was expected to compete for marks. 98 wasn’t enough, neither was being second, the first was the ONLY option, I was told. Ah, it was like telling me to make tea, and giving every ingredient but the tea leaves. They even resorted to blackmail actually, telling me to get that top marks, and I’ll give you a computer. I must have been a dunce then, because I let myself believe that till twelfth grade. That expectation of being a bookworm was unfortunately satisfied too. When that was satisfied, the next four years were sought after. You can play later… four years you do well, you can be happy the rest of your life. And I tried, really tried. But even I was expecting something of them that they went on taking advantage of. When I realized my wait was endless, it was too late. The time when I had to play, relax and enjoy my life, with the friends that kept telling me to come out of my shell, that time was gone. And try as I do, to become that outgoing, extrovert that I wish myself to be, a part of me still has that bookworm in me, who can’t think of anything but a fear of going out of the boundaries that was unknowingly instilled into me. Today, I am what I expected to be, a mostly happy cheery faced person who loves to talk, hang out with friends, try to become better at what I love to do. Even then, that expectation of others never satisfies. If you’re earning a hundred thousand each year, make it double tomorrow. Don’t ever think of slowing down or even going at that same pace which you’re comfortable at… Life’s a rat race… Oh yes, it is. These words that are pushed into my head since the middle of my education, it’s become set into.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I don’t mean to say that once your expectation is met, you shouldn’t expect again. Just that, if you are expecting something of someone, they do expect something back too. As much love as there is in this world, it is give and take, not take and don’t give. If you expect faster outputs, give the correct inputs at first, and then applaud the effort the other is putting in, so that person feels the joy he put into the work has paid off. If you expect someone to do well, tell them so, and give that person what he needs to succeed. If you promise the world to him today, and then again, use that same promise to go on making him chase tomorrows, it’ll hurt later; for what would have been useful today isn’t the same tomorrow. It’s like saying someone to make some tea, and giving him everything but the tea leaves.
I don’t believe in life being a rat-race… where the winner gets the spoils. I believe life is a beautiful journey, more in the journey than the destination. Set goals, and get there… but in your hurry to get there, don’t miss out on what is around you. The world expects many things about you, but to make those expectations happen, don’t forget your own, because some things aren’t worth sacrificing for any joy or reward that getting there sooner will give you.
The thing that never dies… that is expectation.
Let me take my life for an example. I was born, and my relatives expected me to be named something other than Gagan . (Mummy let me in on this.) Some of the names they suggested are positively ghastly to hear. First expectation down the drain… I grew up into a handsome little boy(now,didn't I ?). They expected me to get into the best school; so much so, they left me with some weird looking strangers who asked me questions I had no idea what to say to. I suppose they were mathematics, but how they foretold that I would have affection for that subject, God only knows! That expectation, thankfully, was met and I started enjoying my school life. It was fine for a while, but once I got into middle school, I was expected to compete for marks. 98 wasn’t enough, neither was being second, the first was the ONLY option, I was told. Ah, it was like telling me to make tea, and giving every ingredient but the tea leaves. They even resorted to blackmail actually, telling me to get that top marks, and I’ll give you a computer. I must have been a dunce then, because I let myself believe that till twelfth grade. That expectation of being a bookworm was unfortunately satisfied too. When that was satisfied, the next four years were sought after. You can play later… four years you do well, you can be happy the rest of your life. And I tried, really tried. But even I was expecting something of them that they went on taking advantage of. When I realized my wait was endless, it was too late. The time when I had to play, relax and enjoy my life, with the friends that kept telling me to come out of my shell, that time was gone. And try as I do, to become that outgoing, extrovert that I wish myself to be, a part of me still has that bookworm in me, who can’t think of anything but a fear of going out of the boundaries that was unknowingly instilled into me. Today, I am what I expected to be, a mostly happy cheery faced person who loves to talk, hang out with friends, try to become better at what I love to do. Even then, that expectation of others never satisfies. If you’re earning a hundred thousand each year, make it double tomorrow. Don’t ever think of slowing down or even going at that same pace which you’re comfortable at… Life’s a rat race… Oh yes, it is. These words that are pushed into my head since the middle of my education, it’s become set into.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I don’t mean to say that once your expectation is met, you shouldn’t expect again. Just that, if you are expecting something of someone, they do expect something back too. As much love as there is in this world, it is give and take, not take and don’t give. If you expect faster outputs, give the correct inputs at first, and then applaud the effort the other is putting in, so that person feels the joy he put into the work has paid off. If you expect someone to do well, tell them so, and give that person what he needs to succeed. If you promise the world to him today, and then again, use that same promise to go on making him chase tomorrows, it’ll hurt later; for what would have been useful today isn’t the same tomorrow. It’s like saying someone to make some tea, and giving him everything but the tea leaves.
I don’t believe in life being a rat-race… where the winner gets the spoils. I believe life is a beautiful journey, more in the journey than the destination. Set goals, and get there… but in your hurry to get there, don’t miss out on what is around you. The world expects many things about you, but to make those expectations happen, don’t forget your own, because some things aren’t worth sacrificing for any joy or reward that getting there sooner will give you.
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